Things You Can Learn From Your Cat

February 3rd, 2008

THINGS YOU CAN LEARN FROM YOUR CAT

Make the world your playground.

Whenever you miss the sandbox, cover it up. Dragging

a sock over it helps.

If you can’t get your way, lay across the keyboard

until you do.

When you are hungry, meow loudly so they feed you

just to shut you up.

Always find a good patch of sun to nap in.

Nap often.

When in trouble, just purr and look cute.

Life is hard, and then you nap.

Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few

hours.

When in doubt, cop an attitude.

Variety is the spice of Life. One day, ignore people;

the next day, annoy them.

Climb your way to the top, that’s why the curtains

are there.

Make your mark in the world, or at least spray in each

corner.

Always give generously; a bird or rodent left on the

bed tells them, “I care.”

When you have something important to say, try to say

it in the dead of night when you’re SURE everyone’s

sleeping. There’s no better way to get the attention

you deserve.

Nora the Piano-Playing Cat (another one)

February 3rd, 2008

Here is Nora the cat, playing solo and in a duet.

  http://
www.evtv1.com/player.aspx?itemnum=6763  
Lauren 

Cat Quote

February 3rd, 2008

“A cat has absolute emotional honesty; human beings, for  
one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat  
does not.” — Ernest Hemingway  

Cat Humor

February 3rd, 2008

A  man absolutely hated his wife’s cat and

Decided to get rid of him one day by driving him

20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the

Park.

As he was getting home, the cat was walking up

The driveway.

The next day he decided to drive the cat 40

Blocks away. He put the beast out and headed

Home.

Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat!

He kept taking the cat further and further and

The cat would always beat him home. At last he

Decided to drive a few miles away, turn right,

Then left, past the bridge, then right again and

Another right until he reached what he thought

Was a safe distance from his home and left the

Cat there.

Hours later the man calls home to his wife: “Jen,

Is the cat there?”

“Yes,” the wife answers, “why do you ask?”

Frustrated, the man answered, “Put that son of a

Bitch on the phone, I’m lost! And need directions!”
      
 

Nora the Piano-Playing Cat

February 3rd, 2008

This is so cute, and it’s for real. Cats really do have an
appreciation for the arts, especially music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0zgQAp7EYw

Kerry
For those of you who love cats and have not met Nora the piano
playing cat… you need to view her two videos.

OMG I am in love with this kitty. It is just too cute!

http://www.ravenswingstudio.com/docs/cats.html

Karen

History of Cats

February 3rd, 2008

A Backwards Glance into the History of Cats
By Audrey Frederick

Have you ever wondered where “today’s cat” came from? I have and so I began a little research on the history of cats. Apparently no one really knows when
or how “the cat” first appeared on our planet. According to some sources it is said that Miacis, a weasel-like animal that lived about 40 or 50 million
years ago is the cat’s closest ancestor. I have not been able to find any pictures or drawings of this animal, that is supposed to be the father/mother
(if you will,) of all land-dwelling carnivores, including the dog. Since I cannot prove otherwise, I will accept this information for as close to the truth
as I can get.

According to a DNA study that was done in 1997 by two members of the National Cancer Institute in Frederick, Maryland, it appears that cats have been known
to live in Asia as early as 11 million years ago and here in North America as early as 9 million years ago. Their research was based on DNA analysis of
37 living cat species.

Millions of years ago, as sea level rose and fell, the earth formed natural bridges and the cats being nomadic creatures traveled all over to colonize,
everywhere that is, except Antarctica according to some scientists. Why not there? I believe cats were smart enough to know it was too cold. If you are
picturing in your mind a cat that looks like your cat wandering around the earth, forget it. These cats did not look like our cats, some were big cats
and some were smaller cats, it took a long while for “our cat” to emerge. The 1997 study by the National Cancer Institute also helped determine that most
of the 37 or so living species of cat that exist today, belonged to one of past eight lineage’s according to their DNA.

It is said that the first association of cats with humans may have occurred during the Stone Age. Apparently, the cats figured out “where there were humans”
there would be food and where there was food a mouse or two could be found. However, it took a long time for cats to be considered household pets, as cats
were considered useful, but wild beasts. Then came the days of ancient Egypt.

The Egyptians about 5,00 to 6,000 years ago had learned how to stockpile grain for future use. With the stockpiles of grain came mice and rats and a serious
need occurred. The Egyptians were the first civilization to domesticate the cat on a large scale and to make the world aware of the usefulness of the cat
not only for catching mice and rats, but also as a household pet. The Egyptians were so enamored with “the cat” and its importance in their lives that
they not only allowed it in their households, they eventually worshipped the cat and treated it like royalty. “The royalty treatment” is something the
cat never forgot.

In Egypt when a cat died they were mummified and buried in elaborate ceremonies, even in the poorest of households. Mice were mummified along with the
cat, so that the cat would have food in is afterlife. There were some cats that were considered sacred and they lived in the temples with the priests.
These cats were considered oracles and people would come from long distances to ask the cats questions. The priests would interpret the cat’s actions (such
as licking its paw) and tell the visitor what the cat was saying. It was considered a crime to kill a cat and if you were guilty of that crime, you were
killed, too.

It has come to light during an archeological excavation in Saqqara, where thousands of cat mummies were found that all the cats did not die a natural death.
By x-raying some of the mummified cats it was revealed that many did die of natural causes, but some were young cats (year old) with broken necks. There
are two schools of thought here, one being that the cat population had grown too large and it was a way to slow it down. The other possibility was that
the priests raised these cats and later killed and mummified them to sell to people who attended festivals.

It was considered proper to buy a mummified cat as a way to please the “cat goddess” called Bastet and then ask a personal favor from her. Researchers
are fairly certain the people buying the cats did not know they were intentionally killed. It did not take long for the word to get around (about a 1,000
years or so) about the usefulness of cats in a household. Soon the Romans and Greeks realized the value of a cat and made them members of their household.
Here they were not worshipped. During the 11th century cats became extremely important in killing the rats that were causing the Black Death.

Then came the Middle Ages and trouble followed for the cats. Pope Gregory IX apparently did not like cats and decided that they were diabolical creatures
and needed to be destroyed. It was a sad time for cats as they were beaten, killed and driven away from the villages. Anyone who had a cat was considered
a “witch” and was put to death along with the cat. Cats were sacrificed, burned to death and even buried alive inside walls of houses (supposed to bring
good luck.)

As the cat population was being destroyed, the rat and mice population grew by leaps and bounds. Causing a great many plagues and other epidemics all over
Europe. People were dying everywhere and soon they realized the error of their ways.

By the 17th century, cats were back in favor, doing what they did best, catching mice and rats. However, people began to see that cats were nice to have
around and soon they became treasured household pets once again. It has been said that the first cats came to North America by crossing over the Bering
Strait about several million years or so ago. However, in more recent times (1600-1700) cats came on board ships with the traders and explorers. Cats were
very important on board ships in order to protect the cargo from the rats and mice.

Many early settlers in the colonies brought their own cats with them. Life seemed pretty good for cats until the Salem witch-hunt of 1692 and once again
cats became a product of discrimination along with the people who owned them and were destroyed or driven away. Once again “people” learned the error of
their ways and cats were once again welcome as the rat and mice population grew.

In 1749 cats were brought to Pennsylvania to help control a serious rodent plague. As more and more colonists came to the New World the need for cats grew.
It was necessary to import cats and the new cats needed to be stronger and sturdier. Without cats, the New World would have faced many plagues and ships
would have lost much of their cargo. You might say “cats” saved our country.

As time went on and our country grew, people started moving west. They packed up their worldly possessions into wagons, gathered up the family and livestock
and forgot the cats. They seemed to forget, that where there were people and food (grain) soon there would be rodents. It’s Murphy’s Law.

It is said that during the Gold Rush of 1849, people were buying cats off trading ships for $50.00 a piece. In 1884 during the rat plague that came to
San Francisco, people were willing to pay up to $100 for a cat.

Cats like our country prospered and like the people, cats came from all countries of the world. This mix of cats and the breeding that took place has managed
to give our country a great mix of what is known as “domestic shorthaired.” Today there are more than sixty-five million cats living in our homes. Cats
far outnumber dogs.

The number of actual breeds varies according to the source you check. Some sources say that there are 36 species, others say 37 species, but we have found
with the new breeds coming along that there are probably over 40 different varieties of cats.

This has been a very brief history of cats; they certainly have played a very important part in the growth of the Universe. It is hard for me to imagine
life without having at least one of them around and I hope you feel the same.

Washing the Cat

February 3rd, 2008

Subject: Washing the Cat
  
block quote
 
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a “power-wash” and “rinse”.

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet,streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.

Sincerely,

The Dog

Cats’ Alphabet

February 3rd, 2008

The Cat’s Alphabet
The Cat’s Alphabet
(reprinted from an American Greeting Card)  

Act nonchalant
Be comfortable
Control yourself
Discriminate
Explore
Fake what you don’t know
Grab at passing opportunities
Have moments of wild abandon
Ignore the ignorant
Jog in your sleep
Knead people
Let it all hang out
Make friends with your neighbors
Nap often
Overstep boundaries
Play with your food
Quit while you’re winning
Return to your favorite places
See things others don’t
Take your time
Understand human limitations
View things from more than one perspective
Wait at least 60 seconds before responding
xpect only the best
Yawn and stretch at regular intervals
Zzzz in the sunshine
Have a blessed day.

Regards,

Melissa R. Green

Cats’ Bill of Rights

February 3rd, 2008

(My cats just love this one)

The Cats’ Bill of Rights
(author unknown)

*

Humans shall make no law respecting an establishment of boundaries or prohibiting the free exercise therein, or abridging the freedom of access, or the
right to peaceful assembly. In other words: The cat is entitled to go outside anytime he wants.
*
A well-carried provisional chamber, being necessary to the fulfillment of a feline’s whims, shall not be infringed. In other words: The cat is entitled
to EAT anytime he wants.

*
The right of the feline to be secure in their domain and effects against unreasonable discomposure, shall not be violated. In other words: The cat is entitled
to SLEEP anytime he wants.

*
Humans shall issue no warrants or decrees or edicts as prescribed to the demarcation of possessions or property which are in direct conflict with right
of life, liberty and the pursuit of feline affirmation. In other words: The cat is entitled to sleep ANYWHERE he wants.

*
The feline shall be immune to all criminal accusations, indictments and complaints. The accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and impartial dismissal
of any and all charges provided said feline’s compulsory right to obtain any or all witnesses, including character witnesses, are obtained in his favor.
In other words: Cats can do anything they want as long as it’s cute.

*
Neither serfdom, vassalage, or involuntary servitude will be tolerated, except by said cats in proprietorship of their humans. In other words: What I say,
goes.

*
No Canis familiaris shall, in time of peace or at any other time, be quartered in any dwelling without the consent of the potentate, nor in time of war,
but in a manner to be prescribed by sovereign. In other words: No dogs in the house without my permission.

*
The right of the feline to be protected against unreasonable search and seizures shall not be breached or infringed upon at anytime or any place. In other
words: Don’t disturb me when I am sleeping.

Have a blessed day.

Regards,

Melissa R. Green

Cat Humor

February 3rd, 2008

The Cat Diet

This was sent into me via email from a visitor to my website.  I’m not sure who wrote it but it is a funny piece so I thought I would share it with all
of you. Enjoy!

Most diets fail because we are still thinking and eating like people. Most of us have never had any success dieting. Now there is the new Miracle Cat Diet!
Except for cats that eat like people… such as getting lots of table scraps, most cats are long and lean (or tiny and petite). The Cat Miracle Diet will
help you achieve the same lean, svelte figure. Just follow this diet for one week and you’ll find that you not only look and feel better, but you will
have a whole new outlook on what constitutes food. Good Luck!

Day One
Breakfast: Open can of expensive gourmet cat food. Any flavor as long as it cost more the .75 per can — and place 1/4 cup on your plate. Eat 1 bite of
food; look around room disdainfully. Knock the rest on the floor. Stare at the wall for awhile before stalking off into the other room.

Lunch: Four blades of grass and one lizard tail. Throw it back up on the cleanest carpet in your house.

Dinner: Catch a moth and play with it until it is almost dead. Eat one wing. Leave the rest to die.

Bedtime snack: Steal one green bean from your spouse’s or partner’s plate. Bat it around the floor until it goes under the refrigerator. Steal one small
piece of chicken and eat half of it. Leave the other half on the sofa. Throw out the remaining gourmet cat food from the can you opened this morning.

Day Two
Breakfast: Picking up the remaining chicken bite from the sofa. Knock it onto the carpet and bat it under the television set. Chew on the corner of the
newspaper as your spouse/partner tries to read it.

Lunch: Break into the fresh French bread that you bought as your part of the dinner party on Saturday. Lick the top of it all over. Take one bite out of
the middle of the loaf.

Afternoon snack: Catch a large beetle and bring it into the house. Play toss and catch with it until it is mushy and half dead. Allow it to escape under
the bed.

Dinner: Open a fresh can of dark-colored gourmet cat food – tuna or beef works well. Eat it voraciously. Walk from your kitchen to the edge of the living
room rug. Promptly throw up on the rug. Step into it as you leave. Track footprints across the entire room.

Day Three
Breakfast: Drink part of the milk from your spouse’s or partner’s cereal bowl when no one is looking. Splatter part of it on the closest polished aluminum
appliance you can find.

Lunch: Catch a small bird and bring it into the house. Play with on top of your down filled comforter. Make sure the bird is seriously injured but not
dead before you abandon it for someone else to have to deal with.

Dinner: Beg and cry until you are given some ice cream or milk in a bowl of your own. Take three licks/laps and then turn the bowl over on the floor.

Final Day
Breakfast: Eat 6 bugs, any type, being sure to leave a collection of legs, wings, antennae on the bathroom floor. Drink lots of water. Throw the bugs and
all of the water up on your spouse’s or partner’s pillow.

Lunch: Remove the chicken skin from last night’s chicken-to-go leftovers your spouse or partner placed in the trash can. Drag the skin across the floor
several times. Chew it in a corner and then abandon.

Dinner: Open another can of expensive gourmet cat food. Select a flavor that is especially runny, like Chicken and Giblets in Gravy. Lick off all the gravy
and leave the actual meat to dry and get hard.        

Talk to you later,

Donna  :-D